A lot of changes had happened in the last 24 hours.
Other than not getting the Buddha writing thingy yesterday, today there was shocking news: D is leaving the company! This means that I am the longest serving member of the Hep team (at 1 year)! They’d be taking someone in, so I won’t be the head of the team or anything. The team lead can’t be based in KL anyway. I don't think I qualify too as I’ve just taken over the queries but now I must say that I must live up to the experience! And have more confidence and show them what I’ve got :D
But seriously, AW has really learnt a lot and super quick too. I am more surprised than amazed. It’s either being there made it easier and faster to learn and ask, did she refer to all the files (but I doubt so cos she ran most her own way, even if the data was already available in other slides) or was she just like super quick? I think I picked things up fast earlier too but have become stupid. T did tell V that I learnt quick. But now, dunno la..
Best thing is: D’s taking all my stupidity with him lol!! He won’t be around to give negative reviews to T woots!! I don't like working with him too anyway; perhaps it was all tainted by that one incident which made me dislike him forever.
2nd thing: I am re-hired to do the job that ‘I’ was terminated woots! Sometimes I get confused on the many identities that I assume online. I must make sure that I never sign off my emails, for I think I signed off with the wrong name once, bummer :D
3rd thing: Nick stopped tuition for good cos he’s going to SG to study. I had expected this but wasn’t this soon as he said it would be next year. I was thinking of terminating him as well cos dedicating a day each week to him, only to have classes cancelled is a wasted opportunity. Might as well tutor someone else.
4th thing: Reached home and got a mail asking me to come for the PAC registration. It’s one day in KL, think it’s supposed to be some thingy for a few months at some faraway place cos there was a note saying that accommodation is not provided. Asked to come in track bottoms, what kinda registration is this? Not that I give a damn as well.
Spent about 2 hours writing 2 camera reviews of 400 words. Damn, I haven’t written anything for some time. I don't know why ‘to try out’ needs 2.5 articles but since that job pays better than other similar tasks, I write only la. Just had to rewrite actually. Too longer than supposed to cos was chatting with Chon as well.
Over and out.
Thursday, June 17, 2010
Tuesday, June 15, 2010
A story entitled Dad's Blessing
I was looking for a passage for me to do some comprehension exercises and came across this piece. There are tonnes of these kinda heart-warming stories being circulated by mail but none has touched me so much:
A young man was getting ready to graduate from college. For many months he had admired a beautiful sports car in a dealer's showroom and knowing his father could well afford it, he told him that was all he wanted.
As Graduation Day approached, the young man awaited signs that his father had purchased the car. Finally, on the morning of his graduation, his father called him into his private study. His father told him how proud he was to have such a fine son and told him how much he loved him. He handed his son a beautifully wrapped gift box. Curious but somewhat disappointed, the young man opened the box and found a lovely, leather-bound Bible with the young man's name embossed in gold. Angry, he raised his voice to his father and said "With all your money, you give me a Bible?" and stormed out of the house, leaving the Bible.
Many years passed and the young man was very successful in business. He had a beautiful home and a wonderful family but realized his father was very old and thought perhaps he should go to him. He had not seen him since that graduation day. Before he could make arrangements, he received a telegram telling him his father had passed away and willed all of his possessions to his son. He needed to come home immediately and take care of things.
When he arrived at his father's house, sudden sadness and regret filled his heart. He began to search through his father's important papers and saw the still new Bible, just as he had left it years ago. With tears, he opened the Bible and began to turn the pages. And as he did, a car key dropped from the back of the Bible. It had a tag with the dealer's name, the same dealer who had the sports car he had desired. On the tag was the date of his graduation and the words PAID IN FULL.
How many times do we miss Spirit's blessings and answers to our prayers because they do not arrive exactly as we have expected?
Source: http://www.indianchild.com/dads_blessings.htm
The final message did not touch me as much as the story, maybe I can't relate to it at the moment. But when I think about it, yeah I guess there are times when we whine about something not happening but it turns out to be a blessing in disguise. Just as I always say, God must have had a reason for making things, even bad, happen. Like I think He wanted to end my father's sufferings and his unhappiness. Maybe He wanted us all to be strong in life. I was in a way glad that my father didn't have to suffer anymore; he was in bad shape and having to travel a distance by train to work everyday to feed us :'( At least I don't think that I have failed him in being the person I am.
Stupid story, despite the title being Dad's Blessing, I wasn't even thinking about my dad until the time I said God must have a reason for making things happen. Nvm, 1 day we'll meet again.
A young man was getting ready to graduate from college. For many months he had admired a beautiful sports car in a dealer's showroom and knowing his father could well afford it, he told him that was all he wanted.
As Graduation Day approached, the young man awaited signs that his father had purchased the car. Finally, on the morning of his graduation, his father called him into his private study. His father told him how proud he was to have such a fine son and told him how much he loved him. He handed his son a beautifully wrapped gift box. Curious but somewhat disappointed, the young man opened the box and found a lovely, leather-bound Bible with the young man's name embossed in gold. Angry, he raised his voice to his father and said "With all your money, you give me a Bible?" and stormed out of the house, leaving the Bible.
Many years passed and the young man was very successful in business. He had a beautiful home and a wonderful family but realized his father was very old and thought perhaps he should go to him. He had not seen him since that graduation day. Before he could make arrangements, he received a telegram telling him his father had passed away and willed all of his possessions to his son. He needed to come home immediately and take care of things.
When he arrived at his father's house, sudden sadness and regret filled his heart. He began to search through his father's important papers and saw the still new Bible, just as he had left it years ago. With tears, he opened the Bible and began to turn the pages. And as he did, a car key dropped from the back of the Bible. It had a tag with the dealer's name, the same dealer who had the sports car he had desired. On the tag was the date of his graduation and the words PAID IN FULL.
How many times do we miss Spirit's blessings and answers to our prayers because they do not arrive exactly as we have expected?
Source: http://www.indianchild.com/dads_blessings.htm
The final message did not touch me as much as the story, maybe I can't relate to it at the moment. But when I think about it, yeah I guess there are times when we whine about something not happening but it turns out to be a blessing in disguise. Just as I always say, God must have had a reason for making things, even bad, happen. Like I think He wanted to end my father's sufferings and his unhappiness. Maybe He wanted us all to be strong in life. I was in a way glad that my father didn't have to suffer anymore; he was in bad shape and having to travel a distance by train to work everyday to feed us :'( At least I don't think that I have failed him in being the person I am.
Stupid story, despite the title being Dad's Blessing, I wasn't even thinking about my dad until the time I said God must have a reason for making things happen. Nvm, 1 day we'll meet again.
Monday, June 14, 2010
Things have just gotten betta!
Yesterday I was saying that income doesn't look to be good. Of all times when I’ve got a house to pay for. But today..
• the weird man called to say that I can collect the Add Maths tuition fees all for myself!
Earlier I had asked him, he said no. I don't blame him, I would have said no too. Then I sms him to ask how much extra would I be getting, no reply. The message did go through though. I didn’t really bother because I had been paid in advance. But today he called and said he lost his phone and had been having a hard time tracing me. He said that fees from June onwards will go to me woot woot! He asked if he can name RM75 to the mom, no way! I will discuss it with her personally. Will try and was advised to go for RM110. I wonder why is he suddenly so generous; he doesn't have to be. But let me not be swayed for he has done quite shitty and dodgy things before.
• Got a new project to do – modifying a Maths book. Haven’t looked at the book yet nor see what I have to do. I get to name the price too hehe.
• Given the green light to resume writing articles too! Yesterday it was stopped due to ‘client’ having not enough money, today got money already lol. And gotten a confirmation that he indeed wants a lot of articles, so I have contacted my hardworking 'ex-staff'.
• Sent out application for another writing job too. my services got terminated but am applying again. It wasn’t me who got terminated actually, it was my staff punya pasal laa... so now I am applying using my ‘business’ email add teehee! And I’ve already checked the joint account I have – my name doesn't appear when you want to deposit cash or make an online transfer too, I guess. But let’s not be so happy first.
• Still waiting for feedback on another job. Not going to be easy though – writing 10,000 words on Buddha Boy, Buddhism and all the types of Buddhism in Nepal. Aduh..
One definite thing is an increase from the tuition side. I know how much the form3 one is paying, so I can definitely command more than that. And ok also cos it's on the way out from BT to Kesas, on the way to pick up my sunshine boy!
Edit: Just got a reply from Buddha Boy client - "I've went through your sample writing since earlier yesterday. I find it good and will be able to make my final decisions soon enough. Sorry to keep you waiting but my decisions to make won't be long. I guess that you already know at least a little something on Buddha Boy, that's good."
Woots!! (I wrote that sample, so the compliment is mine :D)
Edit2: Blek, didn't get that job. What a reason given:
"That lady is an indian and the way she could speak indian gives her a lilttle insight to how the language is about and moreover she could write in both english and indian."
Tamil la, not speak Indian. Since when is the Nepali language closely related to 'Indian'? Ok whatever, God must have a reason for things he made happen. He knows I've got 720 more English questions to go and tonnes of Maths amendments possibly at the end of this week (thanks to stupid Open Office man). The task won't be easy anyway as it involves a lot of reading on Buddhism stuff, all the Mahayana, Hirayana thingy (I'm just making up those terms, can't remember what they were). Maybe God wanted me to spend time learning Christianity first instead of other religions :) :)
• the weird man called to say that I can collect the Add Maths tuition fees all for myself!
Earlier I had asked him, he said no. I don't blame him, I would have said no too. Then I sms him to ask how much extra would I be getting, no reply. The message did go through though. I didn’t really bother because I had been paid in advance. But today he called and said he lost his phone and had been having a hard time tracing me. He said that fees from June onwards will go to me woot woot! He asked if he can name RM75 to the mom, no way! I will discuss it with her personally. Will try and was advised to go for RM110. I wonder why is he suddenly so generous; he doesn't have to be. But let me not be swayed for he has done quite shitty and dodgy things before.
• Got a new project to do – modifying a Maths book. Haven’t looked at the book yet nor see what I have to do. I get to name the price too hehe.
• Given the green light to resume writing articles too! Yesterday it was stopped due to ‘client’ having not enough money, today got money already lol. And gotten a confirmation that he indeed wants a lot of articles, so I have contacted my hardworking 'ex-staff'.
• Sent out application for another writing job too. my services got terminated but am applying again. It wasn’t me who got terminated actually, it was my staff punya pasal laa... so now I am applying using my ‘business’ email add teehee! And I’ve already checked the joint account I have – my name doesn't appear when you want to deposit cash or make an online transfer too, I guess. But let’s not be so happy first.
• Still waiting for feedback on another job. Not going to be easy though – writing 10,000 words on Buddha Boy, Buddhism and all the types of Buddhism in Nepal. Aduh..
One definite thing is an increase from the tuition side. I know how much the form3 one is paying, so I can definitely command more than that. And ok also cos it's on the way out from BT to Kesas, on the way to pick up my sunshine boy!
Edit: Just got a reply from Buddha Boy client - "I've went through your sample writing since earlier yesterday. I find it good and will be able to make my final decisions soon enough. Sorry to keep you waiting but my decisions to make won't be long. I guess that you already know at least a little something on Buddha Boy, that's good."
Woots!! (I wrote that sample, so the compliment is mine :D)
Edit2: Blek, didn't get that job. What a reason given:
"That lady is an indian and the way she could speak indian gives her a lilttle insight to how the language is about and moreover she could write in both english and indian."
Tamil la, not speak Indian. Since when is the Nepali language closely related to 'Indian'? Ok whatever, God must have a reason for things he made happen. He knows I've got 720 more English questions to go and tonnes of Maths amendments possibly at the end of this week (thanks to stupid Open Office man). The task won't be easy anyway as it involves a lot of reading on Buddhism stuff, all the Mahayana, Hirayana thingy (I'm just making up those terms, can't remember what they were). Maybe God wanted me to spend time learning Christianity first instead of other religions :) :)
Sunday, June 13, 2010
Working OT - post mortem
I’ve been rather bothered by the fact that I’ve been staying late at the office almost daily every day. ‘Staying past 5.30pm’ is a term alien to the global healthcare team; everyone leaves on the dot at 5.30pm. It would feel lonely already at 5.40pm, super late at 6pm and super duper late to the point of feeling depressed at 7pm.
So what went wrong? When did I start working late? Why do I have to work late? What was I doing until I needed to work late?
After several weeks, it is time to do a post mortem to find out so. For it does trouble me; I wonder was my inefficiency to blame?
So..
When did I start working late?
Since D replaced N. By right nothing should change but the way we work now has changed. We throw the stupid decks back and forth, picking up where the other has left off.
Why do I have to work late?
Trying to do as much as I can. Trying to finish what I believe I should be able to, but wasn’t.
Why?
I don't know why I was not able to finish what I expected to. Updating slides doesn't seem so tough a job, sometimes the tables have already been set up. But unexpected shit happens like having to run past data. This means having to create the tables from scratch, finding the right database in the bloody slow UK network and then after all that, DR crashes due to having several of it opened, each to cater to 1 phase. So that was why I took so long. (was that an excuse or a real answer to the solution?)
What was I doing until I needed to work late?
I had stopped chatting, I have stopped FB-ing, I don't even read the news sometimes first thing in the morning but I occasionally check my mail and find none. I hardly go out for lunch too. So tell me where I went wrong? Plain slowness?
I am doing more stuff now – HBV Asia project coordination but it doesn't take up a lot of my time. Yes I do spend some time on it but the ones I was doing late were stupid slides. Project coordination doesn't really take up much time cos I’m like well..checking that people do their work. Kinda cool to have people sending my updates hehe =)
I think I put too much expectations on myself. I want myself to do xx number of slides but it’s not actually doable. I don't even actually have to do that much, for UK will pick up where I left off. It’s just that I want to do a lot, and I’ve already gotten into trouble by delivering quantity but not quality. So maybe this week, I’ll not push so much upon myself and leave on time. I wanna leave a bit later (for looking good purpose) but not that late cos travelling home takes another 2 hours.
I tried to do some almost scrum-like stuff – setting a target time to complete. It’s good in the sense that I have an urgency and don't do things my own sweet time but to do it boom boom boom, but it puts more pressure on myself. Haih..
I think for this week: Before I start, I set a (reasonable) target. Plan properly and have a clear picture rather than membuta tuli. Pay more attention to stuff and be more alert (this means not being in a zombie-like state at work)
Am I on track to getting promoted at the end of this year or not?
Maybe I have too many things on my mind and am tired, as ahyee said. So let me list what’s bugging me, should be lesser now that the house paperwork is done (but worrying about payments instead).
1. article writing – going ok. Sometimes there is a deadline and this freaks me out cos ‘staff doesn't deliver’. Payment for some are not coming. Some have to be chased.
2.tuition – down to 2 students. One I need to go to the house and kecoh about payment issues, the other is not reliable as a source of income. Want to get more students but when I do, I find it difficult pulak.
3. maths question – ok, staff performing
4. open office – stupid asshole who doesn't review my work and now gives me amendments to do all at one go. if he had looked at them earlier, I wouldn’t have done them the ‘wrong’ way. Asshole. Sort of given up on the total amount to be earned already.
5. English questions – doing this on my own. This is the only thing I am doing actually, yet feel so busy. Busy managing staff kot :D
6. possible new article writing, a one-off job. Would be doing it myself if I get it, don't trust people to do it for me. And will be learning a lot about Buddhism too if I do this :)
I think that’s all for now, actually I can’t remember what else is in my mind. I can’t fall asleep cos there are many things in my mind and I fear that when I fall asleep, I’ll forget them. And I still don't want to sleep at night despite vowing, crossing my heart that I WOULD sleep early at night.
I set a maximum bedtime then, max 12.30am. Gradually reduced to 12am. Still wonder how can one feel so sleepy at the office til it almost feels like dying despite 7 hours of sleep and an additional 30 mins in the train in the morning.
So what went wrong? When did I start working late? Why do I have to work late? What was I doing until I needed to work late?
After several weeks, it is time to do a post mortem to find out so. For it does trouble me; I wonder was my inefficiency to blame?
So..
When did I start working late?
Since D replaced N. By right nothing should change but the way we work now has changed. We throw the stupid decks back and forth, picking up where the other has left off.
Why do I have to work late?
Trying to do as much as I can. Trying to finish what I believe I should be able to, but wasn’t.
Why?
I don't know why I was not able to finish what I expected to. Updating slides doesn't seem so tough a job, sometimes the tables have already been set up. But unexpected shit happens like having to run past data. This means having to create the tables from scratch, finding the right database in the bloody slow UK network and then after all that, DR crashes due to having several of it opened, each to cater to 1 phase. So that was why I took so long. (was that an excuse or a real answer to the solution?)
What was I doing until I needed to work late?
I had stopped chatting, I have stopped FB-ing, I don't even read the news sometimes first thing in the morning but I occasionally check my mail and find none. I hardly go out for lunch too. So tell me where I went wrong? Plain slowness?
I am doing more stuff now – HBV Asia project coordination but it doesn't take up a lot of my time. Yes I do spend some time on it but the ones I was doing late were stupid slides. Project coordination doesn't really take up much time cos I’m like well..checking that people do their work. Kinda cool to have people sending my updates hehe =)
I think I put too much expectations on myself. I want myself to do xx number of slides but it’s not actually doable. I don't even actually have to do that much, for UK will pick up where I left off. It’s just that I want to do a lot, and I’ve already gotten into trouble by delivering quantity but not quality. So maybe this week, I’ll not push so much upon myself and leave on time. I wanna leave a bit later (for looking good purpose) but not that late cos travelling home takes another 2 hours.
I tried to do some almost scrum-like stuff – setting a target time to complete. It’s good in the sense that I have an urgency and don't do things my own sweet time but to do it boom boom boom, but it puts more pressure on myself. Haih..
I think for this week: Before I start, I set a (reasonable) target. Plan properly and have a clear picture rather than membuta tuli. Pay more attention to stuff and be more alert (this means not being in a zombie-like state at work)
Am I on track to getting promoted at the end of this year or not?
Maybe I have too many things on my mind and am tired, as ahyee said. So let me list what’s bugging me, should be lesser now that the house paperwork is done (but worrying about payments instead).
1. article writing – going ok. Sometimes there is a deadline and this freaks me out cos ‘staff doesn't deliver’. Payment for some are not coming. Some have to be chased.
2.tuition – down to 2 students. One I need to go to the house and kecoh about payment issues, the other is not reliable as a source of income. Want to get more students but when I do, I find it difficult pulak.
3. maths question – ok, staff performing
4. open office – stupid asshole who doesn't review my work and now gives me amendments to do all at one go. if he had looked at them earlier, I wouldn’t have done them the ‘wrong’ way. Asshole. Sort of given up on the total amount to be earned already.
5. English questions – doing this on my own. This is the only thing I am doing actually, yet feel so busy. Busy managing staff kot :D
6. possible new article writing, a one-off job. Would be doing it myself if I get it, don't trust people to do it for me. And will be learning a lot about Buddhism too if I do this :)
I think that’s all for now, actually I can’t remember what else is in my mind. I can’t fall asleep cos there are many things in my mind and I fear that when I fall asleep, I’ll forget them. And I still don't want to sleep at night despite vowing, crossing my heart that I WOULD sleep early at night.
I set a maximum bedtime then, max 12.30am. Gradually reduced to 12am. Still wonder how can one feel so sleepy at the office til it almost feels like dying despite 7 hours of sleep and an additional 30 mins in the train in the morning.
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