Long complaints and short thoughts

It would be better if it was the other way round right? =)

Long complaints

1. Stupid kids
Somehow both my part time jobs involve kids and I realized that I don’t tolerate dumb kids well. I dunno what prompted me to get so involved with kids; it’s not that I am motherly or love kids. They are probably easier to bullshit, yeah that’s it =D I wondered if it was my problem that I have zero-tolerance but Timmy said that he has no patience as well. Guess the only ‘baby’ thing that we enjoy is making them =D Hey just joking ok… hahahahaha. But anyway, my kids will be bright, cos inherited their mother’s intelligence. So there will be no tempers lost by school teachers, tuition teachers, tkd instructors and piano teachers. I think Timmy wants his kids to attend guitar classes as well so that they could wear his hats, crank up a Canon D whenever he fancies and be the next Santana =D

(Related post: First post of the year: During the transition from 2007 to 2008--> A teacher's frustration)

a. At tuition
Back to the topic, there’s Empty whom I have mentioned before. He can’t even copy instructions off the board, which makes me really suspect that he is dyslexic or something. Once I observed him and saw him running back and forth non-stop in the class. The distance is about 3 steps and seeing that really made me bengang, thought I was going cuckoo. I could ask him a question (already in Mandarin) 3x and there would no response from him. He couldn’t draw a 2-column table and his sentences were everywhere in this row and that column. I just stared at his book, not knowing how to correct it or which word belonged to which sentence. I think he is dyslexic, hyperactive and ADHD all rolled into one. Actually he doesn’t understand English, thus no response from him. But I was too irritated that he can’t even comprehend simple English nor read simple words. You could call him a ‘stupid cow’ and he’d have no idea as well. I was so annoyed with him last Sunday for various reasons, that I asked him ‘Ni you ping ah?, to which he replied ‘Mei you’ =D Yeah, it was rude yet funny and he deserved it. It is funny when I scold someone in Mandarin, full of anger with words rushing to be spewed out but start stuttering and pronunciation goes off-key instead =P

Last Sunday too, the whole class had finished and passed up their book, I had marked them and returned it, they had packed their things, cleared the chairs and switched off the air-cond, I had packed my things as well but Empty was still copying the questions off the board! It wasn’t as if he had spent time answering them. I told him to just pass it up next week (which I know I’d forget anyway) cos he’ll never finish it by the time I get home. And he’ll never get the answer anyway, cos everyone had gone home and there’s be no one to copy. Irritated, I said ‘You do things very slow wan hor?’ and he replied “In school also I’m like that”. “Good lo”, I said and he replied “In school also I’m always the last one”. Don’t get the sting and can agree with me instead!

I give up. How not to, if he doesn’t understand a word I say? And he’s not interested anyway. Sometimes I feel pity for him as once on my way down, his mum came to pick him and asked him how was the class and if the teacher say his writing is poor. He is still someone’s son, he is loved and they sent him here to learn. Hai.. but I just can’t give him my full attention (he needs 110%) and bore the others.

b. At tkd
Last week, I had another problematic slow kid. It absolutely irritates me when they answer ‘ar’ to anything I ask, in which case I sometimes try to add another question at the end like “Are you stupid?” and they’d reply ‘ar’ as well =D So there was this stupid kid that can’t even hold his arms up for a punch, I just lifted them up and they fall back down again like he’s dead. Edwin happily passes these kinda people to me. There was gook at his nostrils and added more to the irritants. What was so difficult with ‘right leg, left leg, right leg, left leg?’ He only moves his left leg over and over again, to which I scolded “You ada berapa kaki? Satu saja ke?” Then I figured out that he was kinda young, either in kindergarten or standard 1, so I had some sympathy:

“You darjah satu ke?”
“Ar”
“Ke tadika?”
“Ar”

Then I got the idea already.
“Darjah satu ke?”
“Ar”
“Darjah tiga ke?”
“Ar”

And by this time, I am really tempted to add:
“Engkau ni bodoh ke??”

But being only the guy’s first day, I decided to forgo it. It was so tempting and so hard controlling my mouth! But the first day is no excuse for not hardening his limbs and clenching his fists. Stupid.

But that day, I was soften by 2 kids who came to salam with me after class, complete with the kiss. Never had that before, not even when teaching in Rantau Panjang where the population was 100% Malays and still considered a kampung area. But not asking for anymore salam though, cos I feel I don’t deserve it for being such a ‘nice’ teacher and might make me feel guilty if I wanna scold them in future =D

Then there are some stupid kids as well who can’t understand the concept of walking which is to walk with 2 legs instead of 1. The next step is to move forward and punch, and they move forward with the same leg that was in front. @#!?# I told them it’s like walking, just lift up the bloody leg that was at the back and take a step forward, how could you move forward with the left leg over and over again, it’s like sliding forward not walking!!

Once during the last time I taught tkd, I was yelling at the kids and I realized that this was really bad for me. Really bad for my blood pressure, really. This was when I decided that I am not gonna lose my cool and just relax, don’t wanna get so worked up already. This is also why my mum always fall ill and have sore throats while teaching in kindergartens.

Moral of the story: No, I’m not gonna preach on ways to have a brilliant kid (don’t even have to be brilliant actually, just average should be good enough to maintain your teachers’ sanity). The moral is to either not be a teacher or to marry a rich man so that you don’t have to work anymore haha! Timmy joked why am I with him, he’s not rich also. Cheh, hurt my feelings. haha.

2. Road tales
Got stuck in a very bad jam on the way to work last Tuesday. Knew something was not right as the jam usually doesn’t start there. People turned into the inner petrol station roads to save some time and even that was clogged. Luckily I wasn’t having breakfast with Timmy that morn, he wanted to but I asked him to sleep in. Turned out that there was an accident. But what was annoying was the cars weren’t even obstructing traffic, both were in the emergency lanes. It is so irritating that people slow down to watch and cause this terrible jam. Once, the accident was on the opposite lane somewhere near Bulatan Lima but the jam stretched all the way to the Federal highway near Jusco Bukit Raja. That’s really horrible, don’t you think? Imagine the distance and the traffic was standstill, not even inching a bit. (I was on the accident-lane which cleared after the accident of course, lucky me)

Which was why the councils or someone decided to put up boards preventing view of the oncoming lane at the Penang bridge. Their reasoning: to prevent kaypos from seeing any accident in the opposite lane and slowing down. How ‘brilliant’! But yeah, it could be brilliant. See how busybody Malaysians are to inspire such an idea?

So when someone proposed that there should be a law requiring accident vehicles that are obstructing traffic to be removed from the scene if possible, I am all up for it. Even those that are in the emergency lanes can cause havoc. And I’ve noticed that people have this tendency to stop to discuss things as soon as the accident occurs. Mind you that their cars were in the middle lane of the highway and weren’t even damaged badly, the 2 cars were just bumper-to-bumper! Not even a dent was visible. Just an attempt to make a mountain out of a molehill and make the guilty one feel that it was something really serious.

*****
Ever since Timmy absolutely refused to give way to a lady in a Benz who wanted to cut into our lane, I have refused to give way to people as well. Especially those fools who have no patience to queue and wanna cut into my way which I got from queuing in the jam patiently. That incident was kinda unexpected, seeing Timmy so stubborn and really pushed her out til she honked at us instead=D But I understand that as the jam was horrendous at DU, we had been stuck there for a long time and furthermore were in a hurry.

Giving these people the benefit of a doubt, they could be genuinely on the wrong lane and realized it a little too late. But seeing them change back to the emergency lane as soon as they have the opportunity to do so immediately quashes such thoughts.

*****
I have this habit of saying ‘shoop!’ to myself whenever I managed to squeeze into whatever gap there is in between cars. This ‘shoop!’ is like to celebrate my victory in managing to squeeze in =D Cos with my determination to not give way, managing to squeeze in is like an achievement, like ‘I managed to squeeze in before you could react!!” Being the hypocrite I am, I squeeze into lanes too despite all the critisms above =D But to justify myself:

1. I squeeze in whenever there is a gap in flowing traffic, unlike those above who wanna force their way in a jam. Queue when there is a jam!
2. When I come down from Hilton, it is already jammed, so it’s not that I refused to queue.
3. At the U-turn heading back to Klang town under the bridge, I only shoot to the front when there is a date with Timmy on Sundays after class. Actually I didn’t cut into anyone’s lane.
4. There are 2 lanes for that U-turn and those fools like to queue in only 1 lane. So off I go to the front in the second lane and didn’t offend anyone in the process =)

*****
When you see stupid things done on the road, take a look at the driver and most probably it’s a lady. This car swerved from the far right to park without realizing there was a car right beside her. Got honked to the max and I wanna stare at the driver too. Though I wasn’t involved here but I felt that the driver deserved a stare for being so stupid =D And as I expected, a woman. Another fella driving at 40km/h on the highway, a woman too. A fool driving in the middle of the only 2 lanes to Bukit Tinggi: a woman too. Hey women, you are an embarrassment to our gender la! Especially when you cling on to the steering with your face 2 inches from it. Total embarrassment, can’t you lean back? Why do you need to check on your wipers all the time?? Not asking you to lean all the way back like those boom boom ah bengs but just don’t hold the steering as if you are clinging to it for dear life. Most stupid things are done by women, most of the time it’s those makciks. I think I am qualified to criticize here though my max speed is 80km/h =D Old car ma, and save fuel =P Ok, so those 40km/h people were also saving fuel while kissing their steering! Shikin said I am more ganas than her and Crystal said that I am ‘hiong’, so I think I am a qualified women driver criticizer. Wake up la, you steering clingers (and others) are embarrassing the other females. Am so anti-steering clingers, so uncool.

No more road tales, good riddance.

3. Horrible job applicants
Timmy received these resumes. One addressed him as ‘Hello Dear, I am applying bla bla bla..’ Timmy said “Hello dear? What the heck!”

Another thought he was sending a job application by sms. The whole resume had ‘i m’. Really cekik darah. Not even a capital I and ‘am’. If you were to type it out, wouldn’t it change to a capital I automatically? And the worse part is he still hasn’t heard of this word called ‘my’. He was saying ‘this is i project’ (or something along that idea). Imagine getting ‘i m good looking and this is i project to show you that i m also clever’. Dunno what is his work quality if his English is so bad. Come on, graduated but yet to hear of ‘my’ in your at least 20 years of life? He was from KTAR, that probably says it all.

And now I understand the process and headaches the interviewers go thru, selecting, short-listing and rejecting candidates. It can get annoying too when you have allocated time to interview the candidate but they inform you (sometimes even at the last minute) that they can’t make it.

4. Prize-giving and elections
Took leave yesterday to send my bro to and attend the Majlis Anugerah Kecemerlangan Pendidikan Negeri Selangor Peringkat Daerah Klang 2008. What a long name. Ch’ng Toh Eng, the Pengerusi Jawatankuasa Tetap Multimedia, Alam Sekitar dan Pembangunan Kampung-kampung was there to grace the ceremony. He’s the one rumoured to contest the Klang seat and I’m not voting for him cos he couldn’t keep to the time. Despite the long title, he’s not important at all, whatever the multimedia and kampung heck that he does. And we all had to stand when he arrived. Hey, I might do that if he was Samy Vellu but even Samy Vellu has no excuse to be late.

I never had these ceremonies last time. At first I thought it’s to honour only the best PMR students but everyone with straight As get to go. I was kinda impressed that the state government organized this to reward the students. Then, they announced that each student would be receiving RM200 cash each. Wow! I still consider 200 bucks a large sum of money, what about a Form 4 student? Then I started to wonder if this was an annual event or a special thing to coincide with the elections? Cos Khir Toyo(l)’s face was plastered everywhere and he was mentioned and thanked over and over again, sounds like a hint to me. The VIP said that this has been held for years but a teacher told the kids that they were very fortunate cos this is the first and last year this would be held. Now that confirms my suspicions..

I don’t like Khir Toyo and his botox face, that Ch’ng cos he doesn’t keep to the time and Zakaria for his stupid mansion. It’s gigantic and looks really awkward in the kampung. Oh, so that’s what Ch’ng is involved in-pembangunan kampung. Dibangunkan until became an istana. Felt like throwing something at Zakaria but he chickened out and didn’t show up. But Tan Yee Kew is good cos when we went to the Parliament, she foot our (ACSians) meals =)

Yes, this is the season when everything gets done, true as what they said. Suddenly the little ‘longkang’ at Andalas get filled, the same thing with the hole at the U-turn under the bridge, the holes at Lorong Batu Nilam 1B, the one at the slope down to Bukit Tinggi and even the one up the narrow MPK slope. These have been there for ages. Someone said in The Star that it’s good if we had elections every month or so!


Short thoughts

1. Voting at the elections
Timmy is going all the way back to JB to vote. He’s not that enthusiastic actually, it’s his mum that wants to go. Now that makes me feel ashamed that I did consider not going to vote to avoid the jam, queues and lack of parking. But this is a once-in-5-years opportunity and after so ‘difficultly’ getting old enough to vote, not doing is quite a waste. Think I will take some pics (if allowed to) to mark my first vote!

2. JOY!!!
Managed to get NMedia as my client! Boss had this plan to separate the accounts (previously mentioned before in "Plans made for me"), as in MS will have her own set of clients to visit and I’ll have my own. In the office, it will still be the same as we have to answer all queries but this year onwards, she wanna emphasize on site visits. So why was I fighting for NMedia? Cos.. their office is right beside Timmy’s!! Ngekngekngek.. So finally there is an advantage of a client’s office being right beside Timmy’s. Boss said that MS has the priority to have the clients that she has visited before and NMedia was one of them. But I told myself that I will snatch them back from her no matter what! And I got it!! (Actually she will happily let go of any work. Who wouldn’t?)

Have a feeling that NMedia will be very impressed with the attention and concern they’d be getting from their new contact person. I think my visits there will be so frequent that they’d sing praises of me to my boss. Eh no no no, that’s not a good idea, she’ll smell the rat. I am rat what, which makes me smellier and sneakier =D Anyway, I think I’ll be there for at most 10 minutes per session only =D Already thinking of what to do if boss wanna follow me there. When we leave, I’d pretend to go to the carpark but melesap back into the building =D I know my way well enough already, I think =D Happy.

This is how it should be, companies should find clients that have offices next to their staffs’ partners. Then only will the staff be motivated to work, especially go on visits. The staff is happy cos they get love, the clients are happy cos they seek attention (which they have paid for) too and the company even pays for my pakthor sessions by paying for parking and fuel =D Life is sweet! Will try to sneak in dinner as well cos was ‘socializing with the client’. And hey, there is even a karaoke, spa and swimming pool at the club there! Ooh la la!

3. Weird men and their high requirements
Why do yucky men think so highly of themselves? Read: There are 2 points here. First, they think highly of themselves, which is already an offense. Next, they are yucky, so they should even be thankful if a girl wanna go out with them! 2 examples here: Ronald. Short, round, looks late 30s and we finally found out he was actually only 25 and we all got a shock; carries a schoolbag with a bottle of water at the side pocket even when he goes for lunch and is generally weird both physically and mentally. When people talk about a scene from a movie, he asked why is the apple on the table not eaten?? Even his name is weird =D He left the company cos he had no friends. Debi, his sole friend, also complained something about him.

And with all that weirdness, he has a high definition of beauty and wants only beautiful girls to be his gf. Why, cos his mum is beautiful too. So? Did it ever occur to him that even ugly girls might not want to be his gf? I think he should count his blessings already if an ugly girl wants to go out with him, instead of asking for this and that. And to dictate looks as one of the requirements is pretty shallow, IMO. But ..but..I just found out that he knows tkd! And teaches too! More senior than me some more. But it’s GTF tkd. See? Weird! Debi asked if I said GTF is weird just because Ronald is in it. No! I think anyone from WTF will agree that GTF is weird. Then MS has a friend from the same school and she said Ronald is weird too. Hai..no cure la for this person =D

Another one is James. Happily saying this is ugly, that is fat and he likes girls who wear skirts. Well, we like men who are well, men!!

Think these are all some sort of excuse for not being able to find a partner. When questioned why, they can always say ‘Oh, I have very high taste that not a single woman here fits the bill’. So the problem lies on the lousy women instead of themselves.

As Ah Kun always say to his friends, “Pee a pool of urine and look at yourself in it first” and for severe cases of tak sedar diri, there is
“Poop a lump of shit and see your reflection in it.”
“How to see?”
“You are the shit la!”

That’s all folks, this and Valentine should be enough to keep you satisfied for weeks =D