Mad by Ne-Yo

My coll V is getting engaged this weekend and she told me that she is having some doubts. I thought it must be that usual pre-wedding jitters but she told me that he had hurt her many times. So the most recent incident was when they went to JJ to buy shorts for the guy’s father. She chose a pair but her bf insisted that the one he chose is more suitable. V said that the old man wouldn’t wear those short shorts and she has never seen him wear those. Then her bf shouted at her insisting that he is right and people looked at them. She was hurt and then she cried in the toilet.

So, the bf has been calling her but she refused to speak to him. If she doesn't answer her mobile, he then calls the office and if she ignores him too, he called the office general line until the receptionist asked if all is fine. Before that incident is settled, the bf felt insulted when V’s MSN status says “I’ll be someone’s wife in 9 days”. His argument: Am I just a ‘someone’ to you?

I think since when an effort to reconcile/apologize, the matter should be put to rest. But of course, I’m not saying that it is fine to do it again and again and then apologize. We should not have pride. We shouldn’t be calculative. We shouldn’t be arrogant. If we are guilty, we say so. Even if we aren’t, we can break the ice first. People elsewhere are having bigger problems like infidelity or joint decisions gone wrong, so what’s a small petty issue? As long as an effort is made to patch things up, we should just forget about it.

I’ve always liked this song; I think it touches me deeply. Probably it’s because I have felt the pain in being in an argument where I want to just forget about it but what was it that held me back? Arguing bleeds and I cried and amidst those tears, I sometimes did wonder “what's even worse, that we don't even remember why we're fighting”.

She's staring at me, I'm sitting wondering what she's thinking
Nobody's talking, cause' talking just turns into screaming
And now yes I'm yelling over her, she yelling over me,
all that that means is neither of us are listening,
and what's even worse, that we don't even remember why we're fighting

It's all for nothing (fighting for)
nothing, (crying for)
nothing, (oohh)

When we won't let it go for nothing, (come back for)
nothing,
it should be nothing
to a love like what we got oh baby

I know sometimes it's gonna rain,
But baby can we make up now
cause' I can't sleep through the pain (can't sleep through the pain)
girl I don't want to go to bed, mad at you
and I don't want you to go to bed, mad at me
no I don't want to go to bed mad at you
and I don't want you to go to bed, mad at me (oh noo)

Umm
and it gets me upset girl when you're constantly accusing
(asking questions like you already know)
hey we're fighting this war when both of us are losing
(this ain't the way that love is supposed to go, what happened to working it out?)
We fall into this place where you ain't backing down, and I ain't backing down,
so what the hell do we do now?

Oh baby this love ain't gone be perfect, (perfect perfect oh no)
And just how good it's gonna be
We can fuss and we can fight long as everything is alright between us before we go to sleep...

This song is good, it even eased a squabble between 2 of my students. I told them “you’re yelling over her, she’s yelling over you”, Rach started singing that song to represent herself and her squabbling sister and both laughed :D

At the end of the day, treasure and appreciate what/who you’ve got before it's gone.

It’s good to have someone to listen how your day has been.
It’s good to have someone to say every single thing that comes to mind.
It’s good to have someone to look forward to seeing at the end of time.
It’s good to have a reassuring physical presence.