In Complain Mode

Sometimes I wonder what did I do to deserve this type of treatment. Must be an evil person in my past life. Kinda hurts to have someone just ignore you when you speak, like you totally don’t exist. Just a piece of furniture standing there. To be ignored is actually on the mild side, it hurts more when I’m talking halfway and she just starts talking to someone else. No words to describe it.

Feel that I’m left to fend for myself in the world. She doesn’t care or at least wonder how am I gonna solve it. Doesn’t she feel the least curious? Or did she have faith that I’m capable of solving my problems on my own? Or did she know that I already had it sorted out? I don’t think so, I never mentioned it to her. In fact, I only had the solution at the last minute. Hai, I guess the good outcome of it will be that I’d be a more independent person. I’m not asking for solutions or sympathy, just curious as to why doesn’t she wonder how the problem is solved.

Even something simple as borrowing a phone to make one call out is like asking for so much. Not to chat unnecessarily but to cancel my tuition class for the weekend due to no transportation. Ain’t good a reason enough?

And I realized that if I don’t talk, there’s less probability that I get into trouble.

*****
Pissed that I didn’t do anything to get a raise for the performance review. The next one will be in December next year and I doubt that I will be around for it. I’m not staying here just for that review. Now there’s no motivation to work for the remaining time that I’ll be here. It’s just that I doubted I will be confirmed and got kinda de-motivated and lazy to work. In fact, was dreading going to work at one point. Now it’s worse cos I’ll be having this same churchmouse pay for at least another year unless I leave. A whole year, my god.

Talking bout leaving, Yung Yang asked how come I wanna leave media research? Said that it should be quite good, more with it being Nielsen. What’s the hype with Nielsen actually? Yeah, now I’m asking what’s the hype when I jumped at the offer at the mere mention of Nielsen. May Ling said that I’m the envy of our friends for being here. Hai, so now I’ve to stay and get stuck with this stupid pay some more. Who is to be blamed? I’ve known already that the performance review would be at year end. Stupid. No increment after being confirmed too, just a supposed change of title from ‘assistant exec’ to ‘exec’. Yeah, that made me feel sooo.. good.

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3 things that bores my soul to death:

1. Days at work when there is absolutely nothing to do.
No one to chat with, no more sites to browse, no more songs to download. Ok, there is always work related stuff to be done and learnt but I don’t feel like doing it. Thus, not getting a pay hike. To hell with them, haha!

2. Tuition classes
2.5 hours seems eternity teaching crap to kids. Time just pass so slow. I keep looking at my watch and the kids ask for the time once in a while. Start messaging Tim every week to prevent myself from dying of boredom. The tkd classes of 1.5 hours now seem like heaven.

Btw, this post is all about whining as the title suggests, so feel free to move out anytime you wish.

3. Lai Wah’s birthday party
Omg, of all the others, think this was the most torturous! It was absolutely boring boring boring. I knew it would be boring but I had to attend, for the sake of ‘maintaining good relationships with colleagues’. But it was her 21st birthday and she is a nice person, so just wanted to celeb her birthday together. But seriously, I was reduced to tears that night. Bored and sleepy. They talked whole night about colleagues that I don’t know of. And even if I knew, I don’t really understand the language that they were conversing in. food and cake wasn’t good, so there was nothing I could do to entertain myself. Joanne kept asking if I was bored, Sherly asked if I was sleepy and Elaine asked if I wanna go home already. Guess I wasn’t very good at hiding my boredom =) Gosh, bored to the max and stayed til 11pm cos hitching a ride home.

Btw, Lai Wah just came over and asked if I have transferred the pics over. Honestly, there was nothing nice there that I wanna remember, but had no choice and just took the only 3 pics that had myself in it. Oh, there was only 2, one was of the cake that no one could figure out what flavour it was (it was mango actually). Gonna delete the pics soon, waste of memory =p

*****

Conversations that got on my nerves:

Conversation #1

Person1: Training? Every time training but dun see u go for tkd training also?
Me : (Replied some time later) Training for clients
Person1: Every time training but what do u learn? Nothing!

Damn pissed at this. First, my Skype says that I’m away for training, and that first line popped up in the middle of a training session with clients. Ok, it’s understandable if someone thinks that I wasn’t using the laptop for training but who the fcuking hell is he to say that I’ve learnt nothing? I wasn’t even supposed to learn anything from those training sessions, I was to train the clients, not receive training. Asshole. Btw, it’s the same person who has the ‘working is not everything’ motto. Enough said.

Conversation #2

Me : Hey help me find a part time job. Broke la.
Person2: Thot ur bf loaded?

What kind of thinking is that? Do I seem like a sponge that lives off people? I have never relied on bfs for anything, be it financially, to be fetched around (ok, on certain days when my car is at the workshop), to run errands for me or my family or anything else. Cos I know that JC has to send his future mum-in-law around to buy stuff and has to send his car to his gf’s place at 6 every morning for her to use. In fact, it's all of the other way round. Not calculating here but don’t make me sound like a parasite. I pay my own credit card bills, somehow people always have an impression that my purchases are paid for. I know I am poor but I don’t survive on charity. In fact, I used to lend them money. So now I’m the loaded one who needs a part time job k? Oh, so that’s why I need a part time job haha!

Ok, nothing else to complain about. Mouth tired already. There’s only 5 in the office on the day after Haji, 19 on leave. I’m one of the 5 fools but I saw Timmy early this morning =) He sent me to work and picking me up later. My car’s sent for spraying la.. So tempted to head to Mid Valley but we still made it to office. Him to his and me to mine, not at either one of ours =p =p